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I remember as a very young man seeing the film Der Tag danach in Austria. Many may know it as The Day After which I gather in the United States was shown on television.

The film depicts a nuclear war between the United States and the former Soviet Union. Fortunately it didn’t happen, but I could not sleep easily after seeing it. (Living near the Soviet Bloc at the time didn’t help!)

Today is definitely The Day After. I did not sleep well last night, and I doubt I will tonight. I’ve barely been able to read the news. I told one friend that I feel like I was in a car accident, but was able to walk from the car afterward. Living in Hawaii can be a bit surreal. We’re part of the United States, but also on our own. In some ways, we may be in the best place in the country, far from the maddening crowd.

Having a six-year-old daughter with an optimistic view of life is a great coping mechanism. I don’t want Ellen to know how devastated I am, how I wonder — even if the thoughts are remote — if my marriage could be taken away from me following the elections yesterday, if children of same-sex couples, like my daughter, will have judges decide that two men or two women cannot be listed as the legal parents on their birth certificates?

I wish I could be more like my daughter, ready to embrace the world. Right now, I’m worried about it.